More Layers: Book Two Layers Series Read online

  “I’m not trying to justify my behavior. I’m asking for your empathy and forgiveness.”

  “I thought there was nothing you could do, that I couldn’t forgive...but I was wrong. I’ll never forgive you for this.”

  “You don’t mean that.”

  “I do.”

  He stands and walks to the door. “I need time to...digest...this, them, us. I just...I can’t believe what you’ve done.

  “Jaxson, I’m sorry...God, I’m so sorry.”

  He laughs. “Sorry is not going to make this better.”

  “Jaxson...I love you.”

  “You don’t know what love is, Alexia.”

  “I’ll contact you...when I can, and we’ll talk about...my sons.”

  I nod and he walks out and shuts the door.

  I’m lower than sub-pond scum. I’m slime-scum.

  Unhappy Thanksgiving

  Alexia

  “What are you doing in here?” Jules asks me.

  “Sitting.”

  “I can see that.”

  She sits next to me and picks up a hors d’oeuvre.

  I hold up a bottle of wine.

  She nods and I pour her a glass.

  “This is Thanksgiving you know.”

  “Really?”

  “Smart ass. I was going to say that today is a day to give thanks for what we have. It’s not a day to mope around and pine over what we don’t have.”

  “I’m not pining.”

  “Really? Then what do you call sitting in the kitchen alone while your family and friends are gathered in the other room being grateful and thankful to be here and to have each other.”

  “Okay, I’m feeling a little sorry for myself. But I am grateful. I’m grateful for my family, my friends, my home, and my life. I just hoped that our first Thanksgiving would be...different.”

  “Girlfriend, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. He’s an asshole and a stupid fuck. And if he can’t find it in his wee blackened heart to forgive you, then he’s not worth it.”

  “He said he’d never forgive me.”

  “Well, like I said—stupid fuck. Lex, we all say things we don’t mean when we’re angry.”

  “He’s not just angry, he hates me.”

  “He doesn’t hate you Lex, he needs more time to be stupid, but he’ll come around.”

  “I hope you’re right.”

  “It’s not like you haven’t been trying to meet with him for the last few weeks. Did he ever say why he was blowing you off?”

  “He said he’s been busy, and Mia hasn’t been feeling well.”

  “Fuck Mia.”

  “I’ll drink to that, girlfriend.”

  We laugh and tap wine glasses.

  “Why the hell did you invite her to dinner?”

  “I didn’t want to. Chase and JB begged me to invite their father. I said no, then they gave me their pleading, desperate puppy-dog eyes and I gave in. I’m a wuss when it comes to those eyes.”

  “I get that, but why couldn’t he come without her?”

  “He didn’t want to leave her home by herself on Thanksgiving.”

  Jules frowns. “That sucks.”

  “Big time.”

  “But the thing is...why does he even care? Especially after her bed sheet performance, he should have filed for divorce and said good riddance and go fuck yourself.”

  “He’s worried about the baby.”

  “It’s too late for her to get an abortion. And you and I both know that she’s not going to destroy her only connection to Jaxson.”

  “I agree, but I can’t even get the man to say more than two one-syllable words to me.”

  “Stupid fuck.”

  “I’m probably just reading it wrong but I think and feel that something...I don’t know? Just isn’t right.”

  “But what?”

  “Not a clue.”

  “So how are the boys adapting to all this change?”

  “Okay, I guess. They’ve been asking me a lot of big questions that I can’t answer.”

  “What have you told them?”

  “Not much. How does one explain things to two almost three year olds—going on twelve, things you don’t understand yourself?”

  “Don’t have clue.”

  “JB seems okay with his dad and everything, but Chase is...”

  “Chase.”

  “Yes, he’s sitting on the fence—thinking.”

  “I get that.”

  “So do I. He’s so much like me sometimes. Taking on everything and believing it’s his responsibility. He figured out Jaxson was his father before I got a chance to tell him and he’s...”

  “Confused?”

  “Yes. And angry.”

  Jules sighs, as she picks up the wine bottle and refills our glasses. “What are you going to do about Mia?”

  “What the fuck can I do about her? She’s married to the man I love—a man that can’t look at me. He can’t fucking stand her but he lives with her, and according to Carrie and the boys, he’s on the phone with her all the time. Carrie said that Mia called ten times during their two-hour zoo trip.”

  We sit and drink in silence for a few minutes.

  “I just don’t get it.”

  “Maybe she has a magic pussy?” Jules says.

  Sam enters the kitchen. “Who has a magic pussy?”

  “Mia,” Jules answers.

  “Mia. Shut the front fucking door. No friggin’ way does Mia have a magic pussy.”

  “What the fuck is a magic pussy?” I ask.

  They both look at me as if I’ve asked the stupidest question—ever.

  “Who has a magic pussy?” Lane asks as he enters the kitchen.

  “Jules said that Mia has a magic pussy,” I answer.

  “I said ‘maybe’ she does.”

  “No friggin’ way does she have a magic pussy,” Lane adds.

  “What’s a magic pussy?” I ask again.

  “Who has a magic pussy?” Gram asks as she enters the kitchen.

  “Jules said maybe Mia has a magic pussy,” Sam tells her.

  “Mia. Mia Ryan. The woman that I just greeted at the door? No fucking way.”

  Holy hell, even Gram knows what a magic pussy is. “Would someone please tell me, what’s a magic pussy?”

  Everyone ignores me.

  “So they’re here?” Sam asks her.

  Gram rolls her eyes at her. “Did I not just say I greeted them at the door?”

  I couldn’t care less about Mia. I want to know what a magic pussy is, and where do I have to go or what do I have to do, to get one.

  Gram sits next to me and pours herself a glass of wine. “I’m disappointed, I expected...more I guess. And what’s with those enormous ta-tas?”

  We all laugh.

  “Well, dear,” Gram tells me, “if that’s what Jaxson’s into—elves with huge tits—you haven’t a chance in hell.”

  “Thanks, Gram. That makes me feel so much better.”

  “Jaxson must see something we don’t or, he’s mentally impaired. Maybe I shouldn’t have offered him a job.”

  “Or maybe we’re all wrong, and she does have a magic pussy,” Jules adds.

  Marco walks in. “Who has a magic pussy?”

  “You know what a magic pussy is?” I ask him.

  He smirks. “Of course I know what it is.”

  I’m fucked. Even my gaywad friend knows what it is. Now I’m too embarrassed to ask.

  Henry walks in. “So this is where the party has moved to.”

  I’ll bet you he knows, what an MP is.

  Mary walks in. “Why are you all in here? Stewart sent me in to find everyone. Nick is talking to Jaxson while the boys climb all over him and Stewart is stuck trying to converse with Mia. Need I say more?”

  “Go and greet them Alexia,” Gram says.

  “Why?”

  “Because this is your home.”

  “So?”

  “Show them that you put your sons’ welfare
and happiness above all else.”

  Who does she think she’s talking to? She never put her granddaughters’ welfare and happiness above all else.

  Lane and Henry help Mary takes the food out to the living area, and everyone but Sam follows.

  Sam puts her arms around me. “Don’t let her get to you. You’re a good mother, and your welfare and happiness are just as important.”

  I give her a squeeze. “Thanks, sis.”

  She takes my hand. “Let’s go greet Mr. and Mrs. Tinker Hell.”

  * * *

  “Mia,” Gram asks. “What do you do?”

  “Do?” she answers.

  We have been sitting at the dinner table for over an hour. The boys are getting restless and my plastered smile is beginning to crumple.

  “I’m bored,” Chase says, “I want pie.”

  “Me too,” Lane says and they knuckle bump.

  “And then there were three,” Sam quips.

  “Three what?” Lanes asks.

  “Toddlers.”

  “I’m not a toddler, I’m a little man,” JB says.

  “Me too,” Chase adds.

  “I stand corrected,” Sam says, “then there was one.”

  Lane grins. “Whatever.”

  “Mia?” Gram says with a raised voice that stops all other conversation, “I’m waiting for your answer.”

  “I don’t understand the question.”

  Gram lifts a perfect brow. Mia is about to receive the Wrath of Gram—worse that the Wrath of Khan. Better to have a bug eating out your brain than Gram on your back.

  “Where do you work? What is your profession? For example: Alexia is the CEO for Grant International. That means she’s the boss, the head of the company. Sam is a structural engineer. That means she designs and builds things. And Jules is a divorce attorney. I think you can understand that one, right?”

  Sam giggles.

  I bite my lip.

  And everyone else, except for Jaxson, smiles.

  Mia smiles. She has no idea whom she is dealing with. That smile is going to be wiped off her face, ground into powder.

  “I don’t have a career. My father was old-fashioned.” She laughs. “He didn’t believe women of class should work.”

  Gram stares and her for a few seconds, then says. “Please explain, ‘women of class?’“

  “Women like me.”

  Jules chokes on her wine and Nick pats her back.

  Gram waits impatiently for her to elaborate. When she doesn’t, Gram continues.

  “What kind of woman are you?”

  “I’m me.”

  Jules was right. Mia has the personality of a gnat and quite possibly the brain of one.

  “Perhaps your father wasn’t old-fashioned. Perhaps he was wise in keeping you...from working. Keeping you away...from important things.”

  “Amen to that,” Lane says.

  Stewart intervenes. “If you don’t work, Mia, then what do you do with your time?”

  “This and that,” she replies and takes another bite of turkey.

  “Can you elaborate?” he asks.

  “I just do stuff, you know.”

  Sam snorts.

  Stewart frowns at her.

  This has got to be one of the most boring conversations—ever.

  “Mia,” Gram asks, “if Stewart knew what ‘this and that’ were, or what ‘stuff’ consisted of, he wouldn’t have taken the time to ask you.”

  Stewart puts his hand over Gram’s and shakes his head, saying back off.

  Gram nods.

  I don’t know how he does it, but the man can get her to do most anything. The power of love, I suppose.

  Henry taps his wine glass with his fork and then raises it. “To Jaxson. Congratulations on your marriage. You’ve got yourself quite the little catch.”

  Everyone raises his or her glass while trying not to laugh.

  Jaxson looks uncomfortable and embarrassed. I feel sorry for him, for about three seconds.

  Gram gives Jaxson a pointed look—waiting for him to respond.

  He clears his throat. “Yes. Thank you Henry for that. Mia...is definitely one of a kind.”

  “Thank God for that,” Jules says under her breath.

  Lane laughs and the boys join him, even though they don’t know why he’s laughing.

  Marco clears his throat. “So, Lex, how is Cleopatra?”

  I smile, conveying a thank-you for changing the tide on the conversation. I love this man. Why does he have to be a gaywad. “She’s better. We have a long ways to go, but we’ll get there.”

  “Who’s Cleopatra?” Jaxson asks.

  I look down at the other end of the table, wondering if he’s addressing Marco or me. I’m thinking Marco because he said a four-syllable word.

  JB answers for us. “She’s a horse, Dad.”

  “Someone hurt her,” Chase adds.

  Jaxson looks at me for an explanation.

  “Her previous owner nearly beat her to death.”

  “Dear God,” he says.

  “She only likes Mom,” JB says. “She’s afraid of people.”

  “I’m sorry,” Jaxson adds.

  “Don’t worry,” Chase tells him, “Mom won’t let people hurt her, ever again.”

  “Sometimes horses need to be shown who’s the boss,” Mia says.

  What the fuck?

  Everyone stops eating and looks at me, then her, then back to me.

  Jaxson looks nervous and clears his throat. “Mia is quite the horse woman; she’s been riding for years.”

  Well, ain’t that special.

  “I’ve been riding since I was five.”

  “Well, that’s just special,” Sam says.

  I laugh silently thinking—that’s what I wanted to say.

  Lane laughs.

  Mia just sits and smiles. She seems completely oblivious to what’s going on. She’s an idiot.

  “Maybe I could help you with your horse, Alexia.”

  Okay, I’ll bite. “Have you had experience with abused horses?”

  “No, but I know a lot about discipline.”

  What the fuck?

  “In my experience, that’s all a horse needs. They need to learn. You are the master.”

  “Mia,” Sam says, “we are talking about a horse that’s been severely abused.”

  She tsks at Sam. “But how do you really know that? Maybe, she’s seeking attention and is just acting out. A hard crop is what she needs.”

  I’m stunned speechless. Everyone is stunned speechless.

  “Mia,” JB says, “did you know a horse can’t vomit?”

  She scrunches her Barbie nose. “No. And that’s inappropriate dinner talk.”

  What the fuck?

  “Sorry. I won’t talk about horses. Did you know that rats can’t vomit?”

  “Jaxson,” Mia whines. “You need to teach your son some manners. He needs discipline.”

  “Excuse me?” I say.

  “Mia,” Jaxson says and shakes his head, “don’t.”

  “Mia,” JB says, “did you know that a cockroach can live for more than a week without its head?”

  “That’s disgusting. Aren’t you going to do something, Jaxson?” she ask-whines.

  I can’t hold it in any longer. “What would you suggest Mia—a good cropping?”

  “I don’t think I’d use a crop—a leather belt would be sufficient.”

  “Mia, you are one fucked-up bitch,” Sam says.

  “Alexia, you would know all about being fucked-up—wouldn’t you? How long where you institutionalized?”

  Everyone’s mouth drops open and looks at me.

  “Lane, will you take the boys to the kitchen for some pie.”

  He nods. “Okay, you two. Let’s go get some of Lester’s famous pumpkin pie.”

  JB hops down from his chair and takes Lane’s hand.

  Chase looks at Mia, then at me. He knows that something is about to go down.

  “Chase,” Jaxs
on says, “it’s okay, go with Lane.”

  He looks back at me. I nod. Then he stands and takes Lane’s other hand and they head for the kitchen.

  I stand.

  Jaxson stands. “I think we should say our good-byes.”

  “Sit your ass down!” I yell.

  He sits.

  I look at Gram, mentally telling her not to interfere.

  She nods.

  “I invited you to my home because our sons wanted to spend the day with you, and I wanted them to spend the day with our family. I extended the invitation to your wife as a gesture of goodwill. Your wife will not be invited back—ever. And, because she seems to believe that abuse begets discipline, or discipline should be conducted by means of a good cropping or belting, you will not be allowed visitation without Lee or one of his staff present.”

  Jaxson stand. “I would never harm my sons.”

  “As long as Tinker Hell is in your life, visitations will be supervised.”

  “Do you really honestly believe I’d let anything happen to them?”

  “I don’t know you anymore. It’s obvious to everyone sitting at this table that you’ve lost your fucking mind.”

  “Well, then you’re not alone, Alexia,” Mia spouts.”

  I shoot her my “don’t fuck with me” mom look.

  She swallows.

  I look back at Jaxson. “Gather up your fat, jiggling, pregnant-assed, gnat brained, idiot wife and get the fuck out of my house!”

  “Well, I never,” Mia says.

  “Christ, woman, is that all you can say?” Sam huffs.

  “You’re going to let them talk to me like that?”

  “Mia!” Jaxson scolds.

  Lee enters the dining room.”Mr. Ryan, Mrs. Ryan, will you please follow me?”

  Jaxson looks at me. “Alexia, I ...”

  “Save it, Jaxson, I’m done.”

  He turns and addresses Gram. “Lizbet.”

  Gram nods.

  He takes Mia by the arm and they exit.

  “Holy fuck,” Jules says.

  “You can say that again,” Marco adds.

  I sit down and raise my wine glass. “A toast to the first Thanksgiving at Grant House, New York.”

  * * *

  “You’re all crazy.”

  “Oh come on, Lex, it will be fun.”

  “Sam, I don’t like to shop—ever. You’re not going to talk me into shopping the day after Thanksgiving.”

  “Oh, come on, it’s an American tradition.”

  “I’m only half American. I guess the sensible sane Scottish half rules me.”